Sry I called you an 8
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
