It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Boobs speak an international language.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
