dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Randomize
