I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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