Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
