Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Randomize
