If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
My dad is sitting where you rode me
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
