Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
