i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
