hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
he thought i was a dude.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
