I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I AM VODKA MAN
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
