just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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