so that wasnt chicken after all
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
