The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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