can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
