You're completely useless in the revolution.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
