i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
