so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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