Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
