So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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