i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Randomize
