Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
