Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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