In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
