Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize
