My friends, they love my intelligence
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
