I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
