Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize
