we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize