Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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