so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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