he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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