yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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