pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
