Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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