Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
It's official drugs can't kill me
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
