my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
He passed out mid-signature
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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