How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
