I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
