is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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