I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
the day after is always just damage control
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize
