This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
