Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize