I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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