Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Randomize
