Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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