she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
