Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
