i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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