Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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