Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He? As in you personified your dick?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Randomize
